my personal wedding vows to my husband + how I wrote them

Some people hate the idea of publicly declaring their intimate, personal love for their partner in front of everyone they know. Me? I could have given a whole Ted Talk. Even as a wedding guest, hearing the couples’ vows are my favorite part. It’s the one part of the whole wedding day I feel is the most mindful and human. My personal wedding vows might be the thing I’m most proud of when it came to planning our wedding (and thank god because I spent hours weeping over my notes app for these and as I read them). Capturing how you feel about your partner in words can feel like a nearly impossible feat, but I promise with patience time and reflection, you can create something beautiful, unique and personal.

Ok now what? Where to begin? If you’re stuck on where to begin, here’s an outline that can help get the love gears turning!

  1. Intro/How You Feel At This Moment: This is a beautiful practice of being mindful and present reflecting on your wedding day. This really sets the tone for the rest of your vows! Take the time to take a breath and express what feelings come up!

  2. Memories/Reflections/Love Story: When did you know you loved your partner? At what times did you look at them and imagine your future? Any funny stories that define your relationship? Share your favorite memories that encapsulate your love story.

  3. How They Make You Feel/What You Love About Them: Why is your partner “the one”?

  4. Promises/Vows: A more modern spin on traditional vows. What promises are important and crucial to your relationship specifically?

  5. Wrap Up: Share your excitement for the future and toast to your life together!

Here’s the first half of my vows if you’re looking for some inspiration! You can subscribe to the Squid Squad to read the rest and unlock more helpful wedding tips and ideas. If you still feel stuck — maybe you know what you want to say, but aren’t sure how to say it — reach out and inquire about my vow writing services! I’ve helped couples write everything from their own vows to ceremony scripts to speeches! Either way - you got this! And hope you have a great time writing them!

Ryan - I am so overwhelmingly excited, proud and nervous to be standing here today. 

I’m only nervous because as you and our friends know I have this weird nightmare that this is all a mean prank and if Ashton Kutcher is ever going to show up, today is definitely the best day to do that. 

But I think I joke about that fear because I feel so incredibly lucky to have found you. It truly feels like I found some cheat code in life that led me to the most perfect partner I could ask for. 

Because by some miracle, when I least expected it, you fell into my lap. And here we are today thanks to Tinder and a shared love of indie pop music. 

When reflecting on our story I have so many fond memories of our milestones. 

The first time you told me you loved me via a drunk text and mirror selfie. The first time you spent Christmas with my family and Max filmed your every move on his new camcorder just to keep an eye on you. When you moved in with me 6 months into dating because the parking at my apartment was way better than yours. The time you asked if I loved you more than pizza and cried when I said yes. 

And I’ll never forget when you proposed to me of course. How I was so excited to complete a hike without crying to fulfill the homemade coupon I made you as a birthday gift. How you begged me to shower that morning before a 3 hour hike and I didn’t catch on to your hints. How fast your heart was beating when you hugged me moments before. 

I can think of so many firsts and special moments, but when people ask me “when did you know he was the one?” — I find it hard to pinpoint the exact time I fell in love with you.

As I’m sure some people here today may know, the night Ryan and I met I was very drunk. 

Months later, when I saw my contact in your phone read “SYDNEY JACOBS - YOU LOVE ME”. I thought that was just you being your cute self. 

But then you told me that I did that when exchanging numbers the night we met —  after just a few hours of knowing you. 

In some way I feel like something inside me knew from the very beginning that I had finally found my soul mate. There was no A-HA moment I can pick out because it has just felt so obvious from day 1. 

Subscribe here to read the rest of my vows and unlock more helpful wedding blog posts, ideas and tips!

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